Monday, February 25, 2013

Thirsty?

close up of head on a glass of dark beer

Unemployed Reporter Porter


created by
John Campbell







From the label:

Porter style beers were first popularized in the nineteenth century by merchant sailors and manual dock laborers. . .  Unemployed Reporter is crafted in the same tradition, honoring a profession likewise doomed to decline and irrelevance.

For this new class of expendables, we've included chocolate and roasted barley malts that are as dark and bitter as the future of American journalism, and a high alcohol content designed to numb the pain of a slow, inexorable march toward obsolescence.

While Unemployed Reporter is especially delicious as a breakfast beer, it's still smooth enough to be enjoyed all day, every day. And let's be honest: what else do you have going on?

GOVERNMENT WARNING: (1) The Surgeon General says women shouldn't drink alcohol during pregnancy, but between Gawker and the Huffington Post, hasn't the act of procreation itself become a moral liability? (2) Drinking alcoholic beverages impairs your ability to drive a car, but it's not like you have to wake up and drive to work tomorrow so fuck it.

- as quoted by: Michael Hamad.


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